What your Feeling Right Now if Perfectly Normal


Dear Mom,

What your feeling right now if perfectly normal. The feelings of sadness, uncertainty, grief this is all part of the process. Also know, that These feelings will not last. You may feel glimpses of them as time passes, but feelings of joy, love, adoration and being proud will far outweigh the not so great feelings. 

Being pregnant and starting or adding to the family is a time of joy and happiness. Your mind wanders to all the things that this new baby will bring. 

When my husband and I found out we were finally pregnant after trying for years we were elated!! We had been trying to expand our family, and after the very traumatic birth of our first son who was born with an undiagnosed heart defect we proceeded with caution. At my 8 week ultrasound we found out we were blessed with TWINS! This was a shock in itself. Then the real shock came at out 16 week detailed ultrasound. We found out we would be adding two more boys to the brood and that Baby A (Eli) had severe Hydrops and that both boys had a very high percentage of having Down Syndrome. I had no clue what any of this meant for our lives. I ended up having aminos done on both boys which confirmed the diagnosis. And our journey really began.

I knew I was going to fight every step of the way for these boys, every doctor we encountered expressed pity and shock that we would proceed to have twins with Down Syndrome and how hard it was going to be on our lives. They were SO wrong! They couldn’t be more wrong! About a year after the boys were born, I made a point to personally contact each doctor and tell them how amazing Eli and Isaac were. How they have brought us nothing but love and joy, that they are meeting milestones and have been very healthy. I also mentioned that maybe next time they are helping a mom with a new diagnosis of Down Syndrome, to think of Eli and Isaac and don’t pity this Mom, show her encouragement and support. congratulate her! But don’t pity her and act as if this gift of life is a tragedy. It certainly is not. So if you encounter these “types” of doctors, remember they cannot see the future. Most are using out of date information and this needs to change. 

We were given two incredible humans, who have taught our whole family about diversity and strength. 

We certainly are the lucky few who get to experience life with a new perspective, and it’s a beautiful one! 

Love, Mindy @atourofhollandx2